Friday, October 20, 2006

Koran Desecration Threat Level Raised: Code Red

Authorities warned Thurston County, Washington residents today that the threat of a Koran desecration incident is considered to be very high. The threat level was raised after a male suspect in his early twenties was observed buying a copy of Mohammed Pickthall's Koran translation "The Meaning of the Glorious Koran" in a Borders Bookstore near Evergreen State College.

The authorities became extremely concerned after it was reported that the suspect was wearing gloves at the time of the purchase, prompting police to suspect that he wants to throw the book into a toilet without leaving fingerprints.

In anticipation of an attempted Koran desecration, security has been increased in all public bathrooms on the Evergreen College campus.

In a related story, the State of California is contemplating a proposed mesure which would ban toilet openings large enough to accomodate Quarto-sized Korans. CAIR has issued a statement urging that the new law require that toilet opening sizes be kept small enough to prevent desecration of Octavo-sized Korans.

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