Sunday, August 12, 2012

Type-Kugel Diabetes and the World Arrogance Diet

Are you in your mid forties or older? Are you "obese" according to BMI charts and government guidelines and so forth although you aren't generally considered "fat"? Do you snore really loudly? Does your Shul serve cholent and kugel after davening every Saturday morning and you end up actually eating lunch twice every Shabbos day? Have you exercised at all in the past--say--20 years? I hate to tell you this, Reb Yid, but if there were something on the stock market called diabetes futures, you would be a good investment. Maybe you were already diagnosed with Type-2 diabetes and now take metformin twice a day, and something for high blood pressure, and something for cholesterol. Do you realize that if you exercised and lost the weight it would all go away? Really.

Want to know what your problem is? Starch. That's it. The problem is not even "carbs" since fruit is basically carbs. (It isn't protein, right?) Have all the peaches, plums, pears, nectarines, cantaloupes, oranges, tangerines, apples, and strawberries you want. Cut out as much starch as you can and have whole grain versions of whatever starch you must eat. (I would also try to only have starch at one meal a day until the weight-loss really gets going.) Walk--just walk--at least a half hour a day. That's it. Call it the World Arrogance Diet. You can't contribute to the Zionist plot to rule the world if you have, chas veshalom, a heart attack.

(For other suggestions on what to eat and what not to eat, get a book on almost any low-carb diet. The South Beach Diet, the Eighteen Percent Solution [Weissman], and the Glycemic Index Diet [Gallop], and Atkins are all fine. If you do this correctly, you should never feel hungry.)

1 comment:

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